Tuesday, 31 July 2001 :)
Ian and I got up way early and got ready to head into the city... problem was me... I couldn’t just leave the bathroom... so we caught the next bus. The weather was just perfect. By the time we reached New York I was late for the testing appointment. I called and they suggested we make it for another day... which was Fine. We decided to make it a fun day... I went with Ian to the Kleinberg-Sherrill showroom on Fifth Avenue. Marsha Sherrill is such a talented designer, I could easily understand why she is coveted by the supremely fashionable. My watch was in need of servicing so I dropped it off at Verdura since I was in town - an amazing place.... Then I began the Retail Weight Loss Program - toddled off to Bergdorfs, Tiffany & Company and Trump Tower..... lost about two pounds all by drooling.... I met up with Ian and we decided since the city had become a sweat box to head to the country, which we did post haste.
Jilly said that Ricky and her were going to see Legally Blonde so Ian and I did too.... We both thought it was funny.
Please say a prayer for a little girl in Georgia named TK. She and her brother are epileptic and their family need the prayers.
Way later I took Buddy for a walk over at the College across the street... It was a cool, Maxfield Parish night and we had the campus to ourselves.... coming out from an open window of the Music building were the sounds of Chopin, from a grand piano that I could just see... couldn’t see the pianist, but I didn’t need to.... it was a magical moment.
Monday, 30 July 2001 :)
Tomorrow Ian and I are going to be in New York.... he for meetings... me for a compliance test.
Had a very weird day... the weather was fine.... and I felt Ok... I guess, but really depressed - I have no real idea why... but I was. Was it because I look so different to myself... could it be that sense I wanna get back in the saddle a part of me is lamenting that fact... I don’t know... On the other hand the thought of doing and being and living became extremely exciting to me and I would find myself getting absolutely thrilled at what possibilities the future holds.... OK... At least I’m not schizophrenic... and neither am I.
Sunday, 29 July 2001 :)
We slept until noon... waking up... drifting off again. It’s one of the simple pleasures we rarely get to enjoy. We went to get coffee and found Corey on Main Street.... we drank our coffee and listened to Corey tell us all about his recent trip to P-Town.
A slow and lazy day... filled with walks, and ice cream and re-runs of ‘Sex And The City’... a show that we have only discovered a few weeks ago... OK... so I’m a bit out of the loop.... geeze.
Saturday, 28 July 2001 :)
Ian and I had decided the boys needed to be working. We gave them the option of working, part time, outside the house for money... or for us at no pay. I thought for sure they would want to go out into the world... but no, they picked to stay. After seeing how they work and hearing how they fuss, we decided that they needed to be out. They resisted and after trying several incentives, none of which worked, I decided that I would take them to the master, the creator of all things that need doing, the one who successfully launched me into the world of W-2’s..... I brought them to Mom’s.....or ‘Casa de Projects’ as it’s know in these parts.... I brought them there at 9:30. I stayed to have some coffee and get them settled in, but then I left... I knew what they were in for, the poor bastards, Mom’s ability to work a person was impressive, intimidating, legendary... grown men cry.... or was that me?.... anyway I left - I couldn’t watch.
I went to visit Aunt Toni Ann in her new apartment. She’s moved into the house that her daughter Kristen lives in. Now their neighbors. I got to see Nuah too... he’s getting bigger... so cute... he’s all eyes - and a dimpled grin.... after a few hours the phone rang... It was Shawn.... I knew the tone... it was time.
As I drove back to Mom’s I thought about what I would find, all they would have been made to achieve, the gratitude in their little eyes that I was back... that I had a car.... the hurried ‘good-byes’... the promise to ‘do lunch’... later, having to compound off the scratch marks on the car, near the door handles.... ya know.....
What I found was not what I expected.... Mom was acting funny... she was smiling, giving them food, letting them take breaks, making it fun... and just loving her boys... huh....I guess everything changes.... ‘course some things stay the same - me, she sent to the store with, “Just a short list”.... that’s my girl.
Friday, 27 July 2001 :)
A perfectly beautiful day weather wise. Ian and I spent some really fun time in the village with our friend Corey. We were all laughing and cracking jokes... it was a super time.
Later we were supposed to get together with Steve to go see the Apes movie... but our plans were messed up by me... I was visiting with a couple in Woodstock and completely lost track of the time.
Corey ended up coming over later to crash at our house ‘cause they were having a party at his.
Thursday, 26 July 2001 :)
Shawn called asking me to pick him up from summer school, he’d missed the bus. The reason why was interesting. One of his friends while reaching into his pocket accidentally dropped a condom onto the floor. Before he could pick it up the teacher, obviously appalled, demanded to know what he was doing with it in the first place.... duh... Shawn came to his defense and they were all ushered to the office to speak with the summer principal, a pusillanimous little man with a big head and apparently no mind. I took care of that. When I went to retrieve Shawn and his friend I had them wait in the car while I went in and share mine with the little man. I told him that in a day when kids were dying of AIDS the fact that these 17 and 18 year old boys think enough to carry them should get them praise for their maturity. After presenting a solid defense of condoms he was still unmoved. I pissed him off completely when I stopped, looked at him with great pathos and slowly, like a nurse would break the news to a terminal patient, told him that I was afraid my experience has shown me that small minds aren’t expanded with logical arguments, it really is a complete waste of time. So, I’m going to leave you with yours, and not waste any more of my time. Turned and left. I really thought the New Paltz School system would embrace the use of condoms, considering the number of assholes they hire to walk around their buildings.
Worked more on the book.... I get lost in it.... later I spoke with my brother Ricky in Georgia for the longest time... we reminisced about our Dad and how truly great he was.... I only wish I could have known him better when I had the chance.
Wednesday, 25 July 2001 :)
Got a lot done today. I wrote more on the book which I might just put through as a website. Just in case, I bought CancerForDummies.com and the book is coming along quite nicely.
I spoke with Bill Bush in Florida. He wants to bring me to Tampa to be a part of The Moffitt’s campaign to reach out to people who are going through cancer. I’ll be in their brochures and stuff.... sounds good to me.
I read in the New York Observer that The New York Times has declined to place an announcement in the society section of a same sex union. I was very disappointed in them as a company and wrote them a ‘Stick it up your ass’ letter.... Irony for ya.... hrmn.... funny thing is I’ve been in the New York office lots of times... we’re talkin’ Homo-High... they would jokingly say that if you shook the building forty fagots would fall out... so I don’t get it.... oh well... won’t be getting their rag anymore either. I don’t support bigots.
Tuesday, 24 July 2001 :)
I went to see my Mom, who for some unknown reason had been feeling so badly. We ran several errands... bank, post office, some stores.... when she got peckish and I stopped at a small ‘Quick’ place so she could get something... she emerged holding a hot dog, (which was fine) and two small personal fruit pies... and a chocolate milk.... hmmmm..... she’s diabetic.... I think I understand why she’s not feeling well.
Aunt Pam took Mom and I out for lunch... which was very sweet of her, and we all had such a wonderful time. This was a memory.
I had a long talk with Trever and Shawn about being given more privileges, befitting their status as adults-in-training, as per their request.... Ian and I agreed so long as they accepted the responsibility associated with those privileges. We instituted the 3-Rs Rule: You must be willing to be Reasonable, Responsible and Respectful.... (Hey - I can dream).... and in return they’ll have a much bigger hand in creating their world.... *sigh*.... and peace will again return to the valley.
Monday, 23 July 2001 :)
Slow to start, but what a great day. I achieved a good amount of stuff... mostly on the book. It’s coming along swell.
Please say a prayer for my Mom... she’s feeling WoOzy again. She called me to say that she had read the site and that if it weren’t for the web she wouldn’t know WHAT was going on.... I had to laugh.... we talk at least five or six times a day! Hey Mom... if you’re reading... I love you.
Sunday, 22 July 2001 :)
A good day despite the reoccurring dependence on Imodium.... hmm.... strange and annoying needless to say that.... today I did nothing and went nowhere. Course, last night we had stayed up until 3:00... (not too shabby)... and that could explain stuff too.
An update: Darrell, the guy that I asked you to say prayers is doing better... Yeah!
Saturday, 21 July 2001 :)
Planned to go into New York... but the plans were changed... no problem - I’m used to that.
Kris and Melanie came over and the four of us tipped out for brunch... It is so great to hang out with my oldest son... I always wanted to when he was growing up and never thought I would... now her we are.... very cool.
Later Ian wanted to go out clubbing so we went to Primetime. It was a mixed crowd so we only stayed a little while.
Friday, 20 July 2001 :)
Had a wonderful day.... I decided that I would celebrate that fact that I was alive and I would do something fun. So, after going on an appointment in the morning I left for Connecticut to go flying. The weather was perfect and I needed the getaway. Jim is terrific and we took the little Cessna out for a healthy run. We flew over Poughkeepsie... then New Paltz... then we landed in Stewart Airport... then when we took off I taxied down the runway and took it up myself.... what a blast... and we flew back to Danbury. It was so cool ‘cause at several points I was aiming straight at a cloud.
Afterward I stopped to see Kris and Melanie and had some lunch together... that was fun too... later they came to New Paltz to hang out for the weekend. They are so good together.
Ian organised a yard sale... he just loves that sorta stuff... I like to go Yard-sailing, but that’s about it. Trever helped him a lot and together they sold a bunch of stuff and made a lot of space.... which I can fill when I go out yard-sailing... see the Grand Design?... hehe.
Whenever it’s possible - every day should be a celebration, ‘cause you really don’t have a clue what’s around the bend.
Thursday, 19 July 2001 :)
I worked some and rested some today, as much as I could... not as much I want, but I’m getting there. Later Ian and I saw, “Brother Where Art Thou”.... it was great!
Kimo got outside somehow and was there for almost an hour or so... we went to let the dog out and there she was... she looked happy as hell to be back inside... I don’t know what I would have done.
A very special lady, whom I adore, needs some serious prayers... her name is Mary Elizabeth Perkerson, her friends call her ‘Mimi’...... Please keep Mimi in your prayers and healing circles, she needs to get more energy and feel better again.
I was speaking to my friend Bob Clydesdale, the creator and CEO of Patients America.Com a company I personally tout for all the fine work they do to force the insurance companies to cover the treatments that they really should. If you, or someone you know is having to fight to get coverage - contact them. Bob has helped so many and now he needs your prayers ‘cause he’s not feeling well either.
Wednesday, 18 July 2001 :)
Today Ian and I are celebrating seven years and three months of kismet.
My day started at 5:00 in the morning... I had to be up and on Long Island for an early appointment... met with a company to discuss a proposed 401-(k)... the meeting went wonderfully and it was great to be in the saddle. I really like what I do.
When I grew up my Dad was not around much... he was always at the gas station he had working to pay the bills..... I passed by it just today... the garage was torn down and it was an empty lot filled with weeds and I thought it was funny that he spent so much of his life there... and that was just an empty lot..... Ah.... if weeds could talk, (they’d be my kids.)
I saw a segment on the news that labeled people my age the “Sandwiched Generation” ‘cause we are in the middle of dealing with the crap our kids give us along with handling health problems for our parents.... (welcome to the ‘Hard Place & a Rock Cafe’) I hate when they fuck around with comfort food. First I had to get used to ‘Cookies’ being a bad thing for a computer - now this... Ugh.... When I mentioned to Ian about being a member of the ‘Sandwiched Generation’ - he got all excited....... hrmn.
Tuesday, 17 July 2001 :)
Ian went in to New York today.... I stayed here. The weather was a rainy mess until the afternoon.
Things have calmed down on the home-front.... ahhh..... nothing like a little piece and quite.... and no, I didn’t drown the kids..... yet. That tub of water... uh.... it was for my bath.... I swear.
My stamina is getting better.... bit by bit and tomorrow I have a meeting on Long Island at 9:30 in the morning... a real test... I wanna pass it too.
Trever felt like talking today, and talk he did... It was great that he felt open enough to share, but he kept making the same points over and over and over..... I tried to get him to talk near the tub... hrmn.
Monday, 16 July 2001 :/
Tried to sustain a full day today and failed miserably... tomorrow promises to be better... Gotta check the lottery numbers... might be a millionaire and just not know about it after all... heh..... Ian and I went for our walks today and had lunch at the Bistro.... we had a fun time together... we usually do.
I’m’ trying to get the boys to get out and get their own jobs.... since working for me is proving to be only slightly more fun than a spinal.... hrmn.... Not the most popular idea to date.
Sunday, 15 July 2001 :(
In the main... today sucked! Every once in a while they do.... The boys... specifically Trever, would not leave well enough alone and every chance he got he used it to pluck my nerves.
Mom was just as annoying, complaining that she was a prisoner in her own home.... it went on and on until I gave her the door code to open her car and she went off to buy her cigarettes. I tried to emphasize the accomplishment of the week.... she reminded me that she’s old enough to make her own decisions.... in the end I had to stop... She was right - I had to let her make her own decisions... so I did what any son would do... I agreed.... and left her with three little words..... Nine - One - One just in case she found herself in the same predicament that got her in the E.R. last week.
We need some prayers said... for our friend Regina, whose little baby fell out a second story window onto the pavement... (yeeeouch).... and for some man’s wife who lives near Greenville, South Carolina... seems the guy hung bed sheets over the bridges that run along the highway simply saying ”Please Pray For My Wife” - Ricky and Jill had seen a couple of them on the way home.
And some great news: Salina and Charlie, friends of ours, had a little baby boy named Alexander.... here’s a picture of Mama and son.
Saturday, 14 July 2001 :/
Things are getting tough... the boys are on one end with their stuff and my Mom and her whining are at the other.
Jill’s Dad, Ralph, went home today... and Ricky and Jill left for their home too.... I’m missing them already.
Ian and I and Cory went to the movies to see “Scary Movie 2”.... it was ‘eh’... not bad.... but not as funny as the first.... they could have been more clever and had more bits.
Friday, 13 July 2001 :/
It’s been a week since Mom has had a cigarette... that’s a record. For the first time since last Saturday she became social and ventured out to Aunt Pams house... it was delightful to see her talking and laughing with everyone else... unfettered.
Ricky came to spend the day with me while Jill went to Vassar Hospital to be with her Dad... who, by the way, is doing swell - thank you for the prayers you sent. We talked about so many things.... hmmm... I miss him when he’s in Georgia.... they’re heading out tomorrow.... *sniff*.
Thursday, 12 July 2001 :)
Frankie, Olivia and Gracie stayed overnight and it was a delight to wake to find them all at the table along with Shawn and Trever having breakfast. They’ll all be grown up too soon.... and not soon enough. (A statement that only makes sense to parents of teenagers.)
It was wonderful to see Jill and Ricky again today... her Dad, Ralph, had a rough night in the hospital, totally normal, but all prayers are welcome.
I had an appointment earlier which was productive and later Trever needed to talk with me.... that was even more productive. It’s amazing how they really begin to put the pieces together as they grow... it’s a bitch... no doubt... but very cool to witness... sorta like watching the Discovery Channel.... The primitive Americanus Teenagerous in it’s natural habitat.... stalking it’s prey, (Parentus ATMicus) for cash while hypnotizing him with its repetitive claim of being ‘independent’.... this bewilders and confuses the Parentus ATMicus into a motionless contemplative state..... While he struggles to make sense of the chant he’s being fleeced, then abandoned... yes... Right.... and there you have it.
Wednesday, 11 July 2001 :)
Ricky and Jill came over and had dinner with us. The girls are staying overnight. It’s great to see the cousins hanging out together
I spoke with Mom... it’s Day Four and she’s still not smoking.... she swears she needs a cigarette.... she sounds like she needs an exorcist. It’ll get better
Please say a prayer or a girl named Melissa A. .... she’s in great need of them ‘cause she’s fighting cancer and it’s getting rough for her.
Tuesday, 10 July 2001 :/
I’m glad to say that Mom still hasn’t had a cigarette ....I didn’t go to see her but according to Rick, our reporter on location, things are starting to get ugly.....*fuzhhhh* Rick can you hear me? How are things over there?... *fuzhhhh* “Well, it’s Day Three and she still hasn’t had a cigarette” *fuzhhhh* Great... Would you say she’s starting to see the benefits of quitting? *fuzhhhh* “Not exactly.... she just hasn’t chewed through the restraints yet..” *fuzhhhh* Rick are you in any danger? *fuzhhhh* “No, not really... that Polygrip can’t hold up much... hey... wait a ... WHAT THE H... AHHHHHHhhhhhhh....” *fuzhhhh*
Very hard day.... twin related. Just a lot of things that had to be dealt with and stuff like that.... both draining and time consuming.... hmmm... Ya know the more I think of my Dads Father having seven children, losing his wife, remarrying again at 56 to father seven additional kids..... the more I realize there’s insanity in my family.
Monday. 9 July 2001 :)
The boys started Summer School today and for a short time, Peace returned to the Valley.
Jill and Ricky came over for lunch with my nieces: the three ladies... soon after the twins returned and they all hung out ‘till the girls left. That was a nice time really.
I spoke with an fellow named Bill who’s putting an ad campaign together for the Moffitt ... I’d love to be part of it.... they are top shelf... and they’ve done so much for me.
Later Ian and I rented Snatch... .. It’s a total ‘guy’ movie... no pun intended (Guy Richie wrote and directed it)... we both laughed our butts off in spots.. (and ya, Brad Pitt is in it too.)
Sunday, 8 July 2001 :\
I couldn’t get Ian out of bed and the boys were non-stop arguing so before they could get my nerves to resemble pre-hung Christmas lights I left.... went to visit Mom and see that she was OK. She’s fine, thank God and so far - so good with the ’No-Smoking’ thing. I stayed with her the whole day..... she wasn’t as grumpy as I thought she’d be either. Later on that night Jilly and Rick came over and I visited with them for a little while and then headed home.
Calling all Angels: Please say a special prayer for Jilly’s Dad..... she learned today that he may be having open heart surgery this week and we all know what prayers can do.
When I got in the house the boys were still arguing, over something new... *sigh*... kinda like tuning into a soap opera after missing a day.... or two... or twenty. I adore my teenage twins, I really do.... Let’s just say I’m very.... uh.... accepting of the fact that Ian and I are not able to have any.... heh.
Saturday, 7 July 2001 :(
Bernadette asked me to say a prayer for John Nichauls.... I’m counting on you all to join in with me.... John asks for a healing in his lungs.
We got a call that Mom was being taken to the hospital by ambulance... They suspected pneumonia. Ian and I ran over.... She was laying in one of the bays looking so tired. Ricky and Aunt Toni-Ann were there too. We took turns standing and talking with her.... seems she got dizzy after she ate the Dove bar, (she’s diabetic) that’s when the trouble started.... and after another cigarette she got real WoOzy and then nauseous. They ran some tests and, partially ‘cause she pushed, they sent her home. Ricky stayed with her this time. I made her promise that there was no more cigarettes and that she would pay attention to what she was permitted to have... yeah, yeah, yeah..... talk to the wall.... I went back to the house and tossed all the cartons and all the ash trays too. I know it’s the wrong approach... I just don’t give a shit.
Please say a prayer for my Mom... she also needs the help.
Didn’t get to see the fireworks... not a problem as I’m certain there’ll be plenty at Moms house when she realizes the cigarettes and ashtrays really are gone.
Friday, 6 July 2001 :(
Ian’s friend Martha called and asked to come over for the weekend... She arrived just as I was heading out to meet with a client. Later when I came back I only found Trever home - they had gone to the mall. Strange thing happened... I was sitting at my desk when a spot just below my sternum began to hurt... I blew it off.... but it got worse.... and worse. It hurt to stand, to sit, to lay down and I found myself repeating a sequence of sitting - standing - laying down - sitting - standing... etc.... almost frantic, until I began to breath in short shallow spurts.... I was perspiring like mad and getting very scared, (which made it worse). It was about then that Trever came into the room and saw me doing the sitting - standing thing. I told him to stay with me and call the rescue squad if I passed out or stopped breathing... he looked at me like I was nuts and said, “Why should we wait for that?”.... hmm... He made sense, which scared me more, (which made it even worse). We gave it a few minutes more. But as there were no signs of it easing up decided to call 911 after all and just as he was placing the call - *poof* - it subsided. The pain leaving felt so good that it almost made up for the pain itself.... almost - I called the doctors office and have an appointment Tuesday. I’m not at all sure what that was... but If it ever happens again - I’ll call right away.
Thursday, 5 July 2001 :)
Went to New Jersey and on the way back ran into a place called The Folderol. I used to work there when I was in college... I was shocked to have rediscovered it.... and the new owners were friendly and they showed me around the place.
When I came home the painting on the North side of the house that I had expected to be done was not... so I got up on the ladder and made a lot of progress... I’m sooooo glad I didn’t fall off the damn thing.
Wednesday, 4 July 2001 :)
No sooner did I email a simple ‘Happy 4th’ to family and the friends I’ve made, (thankx to this site) - then the whole thing froze and refused to let me back in. I called AOL and was grilled for sending out over 250 emails at one time... they thought I was a business or something, so I explained and finally everything was fixed.... hrmn.
I got an email from a young woman named Katie.... Please say prayers for her... she needs them now ‘cause she’s waiting to know if she’s the newest soldier in the War on Cancer.
Ian decided to invite a couple friends over we did the food thing. Steve, Cory, John and Doug stopped by... so did our friend Mary... but she didn’t stay too long. Ricky and Jill were gonna come too but after a day of schlepping here and there they were too tuckered out.
Kinda funny... the weather was perfect all day..... until 9:08 PM when it rained... (more like poured)... complete with thunder and lightning... damnit... fireworks were supposed to be at 9:30... *sigh*.... Oh well, maybe tomorrow or Saturday.
Tuesday, 3 July 2001 :)
It all started when my cyber friend Dollye emailed me a petition to stop a fiend who was hurting little kittens..... called Bonsai Kitten. **IT’S JUST SICK HUMOR**... but at the time I didn’t know that. I was horrified and outraged.... so was Ian. We were up until 2:00 in the morning faxing the ASPCA, PETA, The Humane Society, forming letters of protest at the cruelty that this Asian fellow was doing to kittens in the name of art.... Neither one of us could sleep very well and in the morning we planned to call Barbara Walters at home to get her involved in bringing this fellow to justice... (thank God I called the ASPCA first). They promised me that it was a prank site and after passing me to the supervisor in legal... they gave me the number to the FBI. I called an did learn that it was totally untrue... a First Amendment Exercise... *phew*... hrmn... now reading the site it’s really a sick, but funny thing... in a twisted sorta way.... Very ‘Orson Wells’ though.
After learning that the Bonsai Kitty stuff was a goof I went off to get my Cat Scans.... or... uh... ‘Bonsai Cat Scans’... and drank the two beakers of yucky-stuff that helps ya to glow in the dark. That’s step one. When I went back an hour later they said that the prescription was written wrong and they tried to call the doctor... the offices were closed for the week... oh well it’s a ‘do-over’.
Later I met up with Rick at the hotel... and they all came to New Paltz for dinner. Mari and Robbie came back from Alaska and gave Ian and me some really neat stuff... we all went out for dinner together, Ricky and Jill insisted on treating all of us which was really sweet.... considering how the day started I think it’s hysterical that we ended up at a Chinese Buffet.
Monday, 2 July 2001 :/
A little depressed today... not sure why... didn’t get the estimate or anything. Just down... oh well, I’ll get over it I’m sure. Ian went into the city and I tried to tackle my desk and the ever burgeoning ‘in-box’.... ugh.
Went for the blood work, got that out of the way. Tomorrow I’ll get the three cat scans done in the morning and go see Jilly and Rick. They’re only up for two weeks and three are already gone... damnit. Not only didn’t I get to see them - I really didn’t do anything that was worth the distraction.
Perhaps one day soon I’ll be able to live near them and that’ll be good.... but... then what if I get to missing Aunt Pam and Aunt Toni-Ann.... Ohmigod I’m getting homesick and I’m at home!... hrmn... (and ya wonder why the kids have problems)
Update: Meagan is doing much better according to Cathy... but please keep her in your prayers.
Sunday, 1 July 2001 :/
Kris came over around ten... had a fun night out with his pals. It was great to see him... felt right to have him about. Melanie came over later, having been in Albany for a gathering of her friends.
Later on in the day Ian, the boys and I headed over to Aunt Pam’s for a
chance to get together with the gang. I was feeling tired and a little warm,
(which makes me cranky) and Ian wanted to go to Wendy’s for a burger.
Instead of going alone he asked me to go with him. I did under protest, (why
I have no idea). Well, in backing the Pathfinder would of the driveway I hit a
telephone pole and really fucking up the back part of the damn thing. FINE!
Ian was a pip. He opened the door, got out of the car, said, “On second
thought I’m really not that hungry.” and walked back to the house. My brain
was fried at this point and we left for home. As I think back at it all it’s really
kinda funny.... hmmmm..... hope I’m still laughing when I get the estimate